So, why?

Okay, so I’ve been asked about The Sum of All Years project and how it is I’ve decided to (over) share so much. Well, I look at it this way.

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I’m a public person. I’m out about my damage (after having not been for so many years). And there are people who live everyday lives and have walked the same trail of tears I have, when younger, and never feel they’ll be enough. And maybe I can help. Maybe I can prove that you can have everything go wrong and still make it. Or that you can appear as though you’ve done everything right and still have a shadow self (and that there’s nothing wrong with that). Heck, maybe it’s all about giving me an excuse for my mid-life damage, airing all of the “back then” BS. I don’t know! And maybe I don’t have to know.

What I like about this project is that it’s about an autobiography. That’s why I can’t leave anything out. Yes, you could wait ’til I’m dead and dig up my unshared writings and learn whose fingerprints have been on my life… or I could own it now and say, “And y’know what? I’m STILL OKAY.”

Nothing wrong with that.

It may be totally narcissistic, but it could also be liberating to others. I’m human. I’m broken. And I still happen to do just fine, thank you.

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3 Comments

  1. Cliff December 13, 2005 at 3:12 am

    Rock on Bonnie. It also lets you know that any mistakes you’re about to make won’t matter a whole heap of beans.

    Reply
  2. amyb72 December 13, 2005 at 1:29 pm

    My 9 year old daughter, Makenzie, was diagnosed with Celiac Disease 2 years ago. I know that you have helped her (and me) with some of your posts about Celiac Disease. She really enjoyed the Raven post and how your friends were thoughtful enough to have food for you. You have left her with so many postive things to think about ….that you can have fun, have an amazing career, be able to travel, have the most thoughtful and amazing friends….and have Celiac Disease. Thank you!

    Reply
  3. Debra December 13, 2005 at 2:46 pm

    This comment above is AWESOME!!! Yay for Bonnie! GO Makenzie!!! Keep your chin up, sweetie!

    Reply

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