But I Want to Change More

Do you get fired up and take action or get fired up, lose your enthusiasm for that fire, go back to "normal," and bitch about the way it is.

Here's what I mean.

The last two big posts — Becoming a Two-a-Day Badass and Ponies for Everyone — fired up a lot of people. I know that because after each went up, I got an overload of email replies to the BonBlast versions, tweets, texts, messages at Instagram, Facebook thanks, "yes, and…"-s during coaching calls and mastermind sessions, and even a random in-person at-a-restaurant thank-you for the fire-up.

A LOT of energy in the right direction coming off those two blasts.

Pretty cool.


you're the type of person who gets fired up and then goes back to the way it always is, moving nothing new forward — not even a wee little bit — or worse, complaining about the way things are.

Here's where Naomi Campbell got it right:

…because when it's easier to stay the same — and grouse about how it is — than it is to *start* moving in the direction where next-tier you lives, help doesn't help.


You've heard me talk about how my life has changed in the past year. Y'all. I'm 47. That's a *lot* of inertia in a particular direction to change sodamnmuch so quickly.

And absolutely no change I made was something that came after a head-smacking, "Oh my *GAWD* I had no idea that was an option! This is totally new information!" moment.

Meaning, all the time before I was ready, I wasn't desperately searching for information about WHAT I needed to do. I wasn't lost, sad that there was just no information out there about how I could start to feel better.

(And I'm willing to bet none of those of you who reached out to me to say how fired up you were after reading either of last week's posts sat up and said, "Holy crap! This is totally new information I have just received from the awesome Bonnie Gillespie!" What happened was I framed things in a way that maybe made you think differently — just for a moment — about your level of commitment to the dream life you say you want and what you're doing RIGHT NOW to work toward that, even just a tiny bit.)

So, here's what makes the difference between taking the totally free information you've always had — whether it's about how to get an agent or boosting confidence or recutting your demo reel or transforming your relationship with money or simply typing yourself — and thinking about how great it would be to make a change and actually MAKING A CHANGE.

These words:

"But I want to change more."

This is a little five-second rule-ish, really, and it's ridiculously effective. (Thanks to the ninja who shared that vid in our Self-Management for Actors Facebook group, BTW!)

It works like this:

"Ugh… I don't want to set up my self-tape space in that tiny corner of my apartment."
But I want to change more.

"It's too tedious doing all that research to create a target list of potential HELL YES agents and managers. I don't want to do it!"
But I want to change more.

Or, in my case, about a year ago…

"But I *love* my cheese and my vodka and my life *almost* exactly as I've built it. I don't WANT to change what I put in my body."
But I want to change more.

And until you WANT to change more, you're gonna sit in that place of *knowing* what it takes to become a two-a-day badass about anything, *knowing* what you'd delete from your life immediately if you had ponies for everyone money, *knowing* what changes you'd have to actually make in order to become next-tier you SOON… and it's gonna suuuuuuuuuuuuuuck when you look back on the bajilliondy moments that passed when you could've made a change.

As Mel Robbins says, "You're never gonna feel ready. We're designed to stay comfortable and safe."

When — as she says — your instincts come alive, what do you want? Safety? Sameness? Or do you want to change more?

Hey, for those of you who — like me — are finally living your life at your top-tier level, pushing yourself beyond limitations you always thought were a permanent part of your life, having as close to a ponies-for-everyone level as possible life TODAY, all this post does is reinforce that you're making a difference, incrementally, with those tiny changes you're committed to making every damn day. Yay, you! Give yourself SO much credit for this. More credit than you did yesterday. Your commitment to the best you is awesome! Own that. πŸ™‚ It's not a small deal.

And for those of you who've told me in coaching sessions, mastermind meetings, and many emails, tweets, and other messages in the past few days that you're starting up your own Whole30 journey, doing a sober August, quitting smoking, joining Get in Gear for the Next Tier, doing the free SMFA 30-day self-tape challenge, finally nailing down your hell-yes rep target list, starting up your show bible, or any other goal that involves CHANGE, I'm here for you. You've *got* this. Because you want to change more.

As for anyone reading who would like to take this opportunity to complain… again… about how it's just not gonna work… please, tell it to Naomi Campbell.


Signing off with the following: New York creatives who wanna jam with me in September, start here. Los Angeles creatives who wanna jam with me in August, start here. Creatives worldwide who wanna Get in Gear with me right now, start here. And heeeeeeeyyyyyyy, members of The SMFA Vault, I'll be broadcasting live on that whole "clearing old beliefs" deep-dive on Wednesday afternoon. See you in the DOJO for that bit of badassery!


Bonnie Gillespie is living her dreams by helping others figure out how to live theirs. Wanna work with Bon? Start here. Thanks!

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  1. Fernanda August 11, 2017 at 1:19 am

    Love this post so much.

    Favourite part: “Hey, for those of you who β€” like me β€” are finally living your life at your top-tier level, pushing yourself beyond limitations you always thought were a permanent part of your life, having as close to a ponies-for-everyone level as possible life TODAY, all this post does is reinforce that you’re making a difference, incrementally, with those tiny changes you’re committed to making every damn day. Yay, you!” Copying this to my file of good stuff to be re-read.

    I’m so glad I found you. Wish I would have found you sooner. xo, Fernanda

  2. Bonnie Gillespie Bonnie Gillespie August 14, 2017 at 10:10 pm

    Thank you, Fernanda. SO glad we found EACH OTHER! <3 You are a delight and I enjoy all the growth we'll share!


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