I was watching a very cool documentary over the weekend about a famous feature film and there was a whole segment that got me fired up about what a freakin’ great idea this is.
It’s not the first time I’ve heard of this happening or even experienced it in my own life, but it was so incredibly clear that I knew I couldn’t wait to share it with you.
The idea is to lean into your weaknesses.
Stick with me. š
So, there was this musical number in the film and one of the principal actors isn’t that much of a dancer but all cast members had to be dancing so she was doing her best to keep her moves small enough not to distract from those in the cast who actually CAN dance. (OMG, this has so been me. Where’s my jazz square at?!?)
At one point, she did something *so* wrong that it caused her to bonk heads with someone else who was doing the move correctly (and in the right direction). Blammo! They’re seeing stars and of course laughing because it’s all so ridiculous.
The choreographer comes over to the pair after a while and says, “That thing you did a few run-throughs back. With you going the wrong way and the two of you colliding? Let’s USE that. Can we?” Then she looked directly at the “moves well but can’t really dance” actor who’s responsible for the situation and said, “Don’t TRY to be good at this. Just do what comes naturally.”
Again, the actors fell into laughter because OMG what a hoot that piece of direction had the potential to be, right?
But they did it… and a moment of cinematic history was born.
Just like that — by embracing imperfection, by going with what’s natural, by leaning into her weakness — the BETTER outcome was revealed.
Where can you lean into a weakness today?
Take something that you’re generally not all that great at… consider letting THAT be the way you do a thing for a change rather than pushing against it, trying to hide it, hoping no one will notice it while you KEEP using the over-developed Popeye-sized muscles you have for “that thing that always works” in your life.
Places I’ve leaned into my weaknesses and had massive payoffs:
~ launching at 85% (I used to see 99% as a reason to beat myself up for not scoring a 100)
~ dancing (I would avoid it like the plague… then I became a pole fitness junkie in my 40s!)
~ cooking (“I burn water” was the lie I told myself ’til Whole30 changed my life forever)
~ being sober (boy, did I used to suck at that)
~ relationships (my love life was filled with 9-month to 18-month long courtships)
What are some of your weaknesses? Can you find an excuse to lean INTO one instead of pushing away from it today?
Share with me if you’re willing to give this a try! Comments are open just below.
On Wednesday, I’ll be livestreaming at 11:30am PDT (translate that to your timezone) and I’d love for you to join me. We’ll dive in on how you’re leaning on your weaknesses, I’ll share a bit about my new ventures (SO! EXCITED!), and of course, you can ask me anything live and I’ll do my best to help!
Stay inspired, you glorious creature. There’s so much important work to do!
So much love flowing your way,
Enoughness is an inside job… and sometimes you need a guide to find your way there. Let Bonnie Gillespie get you started.
Love this. I try to lean into what I donāt know or donāt like as a means to grow because what you resist persists and so itās a great revealer. The one thing I seem to still resist is pretty much the thing that is a huge part of what makes me me. My height. Logically I know itās silly to resist it. My bf LOVES my height. A channel told me years ago that I was part of a tribe of very tall and powerful women in a past life and one of the reasons Iām physically small in this life is to remember how big I am. Truth. No one who knows me thinks of me as a āsmallā person despite my size. And so many people say itās such a good thing in our business but Iām shorter than most and donāt usually buy it. It hasnāt stopped me from working but I know my resistance to this even tho not as bad as when I was young gets in my way because there is that part of me that doesnāt see myself as I truly am. My heart is so ready for me to scream F it and accept what I cannot change and own it. I mean what a waste of my time and energy. This is the weakness I get to lean into and allow to be my gift and superpower.
Great work, Kavi! You are enough, exactly as you are. ā¤
One thing I believe I can work on is control. Iāll try to manipulate things so that they are more my way. So somebody will tell me the way a thing is, and if I donāt agree then I will repeat what they said but with my own little edit there so that itās more palatable to me. There is a difference between trying to manipulate circumstances and trying to perhaps cooperatively adjust them. As I think about it, the reason for this is because I want to control, and sometimes that stems from insecurity. So I think If I can let others have the reins where thatās the better idea and myself approach with a more servant attitude, there wonāt be so much friction in my life. If I do me and let others do them.
Another weak area for me is sweets. I love them, and I eat too much of them and they clean to me. There is no way I fell on my height should be my weight with the body fat percentage that I have. Really, a lot of the weakness that I have sentence from the lack of self-control, that is a spiritual thing that needs to be manifested physically.
I used to be a perfectionist with projects until I started coaching entrepreneurs in Lean Startup principals. I very quickly learned to embrace the idea of a Minimum Viable Product (MVP) and now I’m comfortable with launching anywhere past 50% and then rolling with the iterations as things evolve. It’s been liberating!
A weakness I’m working through right now a resurgence of Imposter Syndrome despite some very positive things that have happened in my professional life lately. I’m starting to understand that perhaps Imposter Syndrome is a series of plateaus and we just keep encountering them each time we tier jump. Some days it feels like a game of Mario Bros, but I’m committed to keep jumping up and bashing through the mental blocks.
Keep busting through those blocks, Marie! You’re doing great work!
I love this. It’s centered in self love and that always allows the subconscious to generate solutions. One example that comes to mind when it comes to leaning into my weaknesses is my participation at a workshop with one of the world’s leading acting coaches. I came in days late and for the last two days because I had no idea he was in town so I didn’t have the days of coreography the others had studied. I only got 10 minutes of coreography practice on the same day he was auditioning the dancing. So I realized due to the nature of the steps I wasn’t going to stand a chance. I leaned into it and decided to audition as if I was a newbie taking everyone in, who wanted to dance like the pros and believed in her star power, I thought of Dirty Dancing and just braved on. I embraced my weakness and smiled while I was improvising. The coach somehow picked up on all my intentions and decided to have them put on “Time of my Life” and had the whole class dance to that and embrace the moment while a camera was following us. š¤£ So instead of being berrated for completely improvising and missing all the coreographed steps, I ended up sparking a beautiful moment. Besides, mistakes are just portals of discovery.
YES!! So awesome, Anamaria.
Thanks for taking my question today, Bonnie. Iām better about what I talked about, but I want to be completely done with it. I make better decisions when I donāt abdicate that authority to somebody else. In fact, thinking about it, I tend to make great decisions when I really follow my gut more. I never thought of it as an enough mess issue, but as you explained it, I get it. Youāre freaking brilliant, Bonnie.
24 hours later, your answer to my question on the livestream was life-changing for me. Didnāt realize how much I still let others make decisions for meānow only asking advice for informationāwill make decisions and take responsibility for them myself, not fob it off on others!! Hacked at myself, but a healthy kind of hacked that moves one to action.
Glad it had such a positive effect, Sean!