Seems to be going around. There’s an outbreak of bad manners intersecting with a heightened level of sensitivity. And it has caused my inbox to become filled with emails from actors wondering why casting directors are such meanies.

Well, here’s the short answer: Most of us aren’t. Most of us are actually really decent people who treat professional actors professionally and unprofessional actors politely.

But even decent people who almost always behave professionally sometimes have bad days. Now, that doesn’t give anyone the right to be flat-out mean to someone who’s just doing his best, but not everyone plays by the same rules.

However, in at least a couple of the examples that actors have been emailing to me this week, the “bad behavior” isn’t actually coming from casting directors. It’s coming from folks who are bypassing the casting director and putting out breakdowns on their own. Sometimes it’s a producer doing her own thing. Sometimes it’s an actor trying to bring together a project for himself, searching for a supporting cast. And sometimes, yes, it is a casting director. And, at least from some of the examples you’ve sent my way, I’d have to agree: We’re dealing with some meanies.

That said, the “fix” for this situations is easy: Toughen up. (Oh, and in case you think I mean it’s the actor who needs to toughen up, let me assure you that this goes for these “casting people” too. Bear with me. This will make sense in a moment.)

From an email:

What would you say to the following negative breakdown content?

I thought the casting director was a bit rude in explaining that she didn’t want frivolous submissions. Do you think she might have been friendlier? I think she could have.

The example this actor emailed came from a non-CD casting person. Meaning, the person who released the breakdown isn’t known for being a casting director. She is an actor and that means this is quite possibly a project she’s producing for herself, and she’s looking to fill in the rest of the cast through this breakdown and the subsequent auditioning process.

That doesn’t mean she gets a free pass at the common professional courtesy that casting directors should (and most often, do) extend to actors who are kind enough to submit on our breakdowns (I mean, c’mon! We wouldn’t have a job without actors, so it’s really a great thing that y’all submit at all), but it means she hasn’t seen the volume of casting from the CD-side of things to know that she is going to receive inappropriate submissions and, to save her sanity, she will need to learn to “get over it.”

Believe me, there is no way she will be able to “ban” actors from “all future auditions” she holds. Well… I guess she could spend her energy creating a list of folks to never never never let in the door, but what a waste! And then, when one of the folks on her NEVER list is perfect for a role, she’s going to — What? — cast someone less-right for the role because this actor wasn’t “EXACTLY” what she was looking for on a breakdown way back when and went ahead and submitted anyway? No. No way. People who actually have careers as casting directors have employers (like producers, directors, studios, production companies, networks) and if one of those higher-ups says, “Bring me so-and-so,” no one is going to stand for some CD saying, “No. I refuse. He submitted incorrectly on a nonunion buy-out breakdown I ran four years ago.” No way.

So, yeah, this person was unreasonably negative in her breakdown. But that means two things: Actors who get their feelings hurt by that “tone” need to toughen up (there are many, many worse things in life that’ll hurt like hell if that gets you upset) and casting directors who find it simply intolerable to receive off-the-mark submissions need to toughen up if they ever plan to do this casting job for more than a minute.

From another email:

Quick question. This producer got quite upset at receiving a pile of cover letters with incorrect submissions that pitched themselves, told her how great they were, and why she should use them even if they were not the exact right age or type she had specified. I don’t blame her, but now the actors who submitted themselves are all bent out of shape. In general, was she wrong in letting the actors know that the pitches were out of line?

No one likes to think they’re out of line in pursing work. So, the truth — that they were totally wrong in trying to sway her to go outside of the exact specs she made VERY clear up front — may hurt, but it is the truth.

It’s not any more the actor’s job to tell a producer or casting director why she should change her criteria than it is the producer’s or casting director’s job to tell the actor what agent to sign with or where to train. The actors who have tried to influence this person from going outside her clearly-stated criteria are in the wrong, plain and simple.

That said, they are doing their best to manage their careers and that sometimes includes pitching themselves for roles just outside their true qualifications. Their enthusiasm is sometimes rewarded — so they feel they have to at least go for it, and y’know what? They’re right!

(The proper way to do it is with just a short note that states: “In case you expand your age range…” by the way. That way, you’ve acknowledged that you’re asking us to go outside our very clear specifications in a professional yet non-presumptuous way.)

So, that leaves us with someone expressing frustration over the fact that her job is made harder by people who “don’t read” or who “try to bend the rules” when she has been so very clear about what she’s looking for. It IS frustrating. I wrote a whole piece called “Actors Can’t Read” about exactly that. Sometimes I am so completely frustrated with actors’ inability to let me do my job that I need to take time off.

But it’s the truth — and it’s this person’s right to express her frustration over inappropriate submissions. She’s basically experiencing a bunch of people (outside of those who actually do have the right to do so) telling her how to do her job. And that’s not fun.

That said, if she’s gonna work in any casting-type capacity in the future, she’s gonna need to learn how to get over it and mainly just ignore those who insist on working outside her guidelines to try and make her change her criteria. It comes with the job — and those of us with more experience simply ignore the flood altogether. Or we start limiting access to the public and go directly to agents and managers, because they respect the process much more. They know when and with whom they can push a little bit.

What no one seems to realize is that he or she is one of dozens upon dozens (if not hundreds) stepping out of line at once, with “one little request for consideration. Just hear me out!” So, when a CD expresses frustration, it’s at the masses. An actor would feel the same way if dozens (or hundreds) of people with no right to do so called or wrote in all at once saying, “You should do this! You really should do that!”

So, yeah, the expression of frustration is justified, but no one wants to be told he or she did something wrong in his or her pursuit of work.

Basically, everyone needs to toughen up. Actors need to not be taken aback for having been called on stepping out of line. And those who post casting notices (whether they are full-on casting directors or hobbyists) need to realize this just comes with the territory and let it go. Posting bossy or negative-in-tone instructions won’t stop the influx of inappropriate submissions. And complaining about folks’ inability to read (or refusal to follow instructions) is a human right. Just like you have the right to say, “Hey! Why did she even call me in for this role? What a waste of time! I don’t speak French,” we have the right to mention our frustration at off-the-mark submissions.

And, hey, sometimes your off-the-mark submissions are rewarded with auditions, with bookings, with long-term multi-booking relationships that span years. So, you pretty much have to do it. And we all have to toughen up a bit.

Bonnie Gillespie is living her dreams by helping others figure out how to live theirs. Wanna work with Bon? Start here. Thanks!

Originally published by Actors Access at http://more.showfax.com/columns/avoice/archives/000786.html. Please support the many wonderful resources provided by the Breakdown Services family. This posting is the author’s personal archive.