Good Actor, Bad Actor, Ugly Actor

So, I’m in a meeting with the owner of Breakdown Services (Gary Marsh) and he stops conversation to say, “Bonnie, do an article on proper actor etiquette and include this…” (I won’t say which one of the items below comes from his directive, but it’s there). Soon after that exchange, I had encounters with working actors who have had recent opportunities to participate in casting sessions (through internships, theatre companies, working as readers, etc.). Each actor felt the need to share with me a laundry list of “every stupid thing” actors did at these auditions. Like I didn’t already know! C’mon, folks, this is why I recommend that actors intern for agencies or casting offices, sign in actors at sessions, read opposite actors in casting calls, or even answer phones and sort headshots for a day.

Still, it got me thinking: Why not share the wealth of what my friends and colleagues are experiencing? And what did I receive in the mail last week? A great postcard from an actor, encouraging me to call her in for a general this pilot season. She listed the top five reasons I should bring her in. One of the humorous reasons actually made me laugh out loud. She pledged never “to wear perfume, shake your hand, rearrange your desk, bring scary props, kiss or slap you (even if it’s called for in the scene).” Brilliant! Clearly, this actor has read more than a few casting director pet peeve lists and I applaud her for making light of such lists in a way that made me giggle.

So, for those of you who already get this (good), enjoy the laughs. For those of you who see yourselves in this list (bad) and make a change, thank you! And for those of you who read this list and don’t get it, don’t make a change, and think there’s no way any of this applies to you (ugly), well, I guess there’s nothing else to say, really.

Enjoy!

Good Actor In Class: Prompt, attentive, eager to learn something new, happy to stretch acting muscles, willing to work on challenging material and with new partners, grateful for feedback.

Bad Actor In Class: Often tardy, only interested in what’s being said during notes on his or her own scenework, unwilling to give thoughtful feedback to others, disinterested in working with new partners.

Ugly Actor In Class: Occasionally absent, gives self-centered notes to others (always bringing the examples back to “me, me, me”), argues with the instructor just on principle, isn’t prepared, doesn’t feel the need to grow as a performer and really only takes class to share his or her “gifts” with other actors.

Good Actor’s Submission: On time, accurate to the breakdown, with no postage due, brief but professional cover letter or comprehensive Post-It note on a SINGLE headshot that is most-appropriate for the type of character and style of project. Contact information clearly included.

Bad Actor’s Submission: Sent after the deadline listed within the breakdown (along with a note explaining why the submission should still be considered; often requesting, “Just bring me straight to callbacks if I’m late”), postage due, five different headshots (with a note stating that this proves the actor would be equally good playing the child or the parent, since there’s such great range here), only contact information is an email address something along the lines of “hotsexyactor@hollywoodhotties.com”).

Ugly Actor’s Submission: Hand-delivered on the day of prereads (long after the submission deadline) with an aggressive stance (“No, you have to see me. Seriously. I am made for this role. I know the CD would love me if she would just let me audition right now. Seriously. God told me that this was my break”); totally off-the-mark from what type, age, and gender is listed in the breakdown; unwilling to leave until seen (oh, and by the way, the casting assistant doesn’t even roll tape on this audition).

Good Actor Leaving a Message for a Casting Director: “Hi, it’s Sally Solo returning your call. My number is 310.555.1212. You wanted to know whether I’m available at 3pm Tuesday for a preread for the role of Susie in Cool New Pilot. Yes. I am available and you may consider this my confirmation. I have gotten the sides and will see you at Studio South, 2nd floor. Thanks for calling! Again, if you need to reach me, my number is 310 (pause) 555 (pause) 1212 and this is Sally Solo confirming for Tuesday, 3pm. Thanks!”

Bad Actor Leaving a Message for a Casting Director: “Hi, it’s Sally returning your call about the project. I’m confirmed for 3pm Tuesday and I’ll see you there. My number is 310.555.1212. Thanks.”

Ugly Actor Leaving a Message for a Casting Director: “Hi. (smacking gum) You called me (pause) about an audition. (loud cough) Yeah. I’ll be there. (snort) Thanks. (pause) Oh, yeah. (Speedy Gonzales mode) 310.555.1212. (smacking gum) Thanks.”

Good Actor’s Theatre Company Audition: Early arrival, multiple copies of headshots attached to resumés, copy of demo reel handy in case it’s requested, required material memorized (whether provided sides or asked to prepare monologues). When engaged in conversation, polite and professional. Ready to discuss the company and potential for growth within its membership.

Bad Actor’s Theatre Company Audition: Prompt arrival, a headshot and resumé, required material more-or-less memorized. When engaged in conversation, polite but a little too casual. Clearly not up on homework about the company’s membership or upcoming season but pleasant nonetheless.

Ugly Actor’s Theatre Company Audition: Late arrival (no call), no headshot (“Don’t you have the one I mailed in?”), required material dismissed (“Nobody told me I had to have two monologues! Sheesh!”), sense of entitlement dripping from every word and action, obviously would prefer to be anywhere but here.

Good Actor’s Callback: Early arrival, multiple copies of headshots attached to resumés, copy of demo reel handy in case it’s requested, off-book for sides, ready to do exactly what got the actor to that callback in the first place. Prepared to review shooting schedule if necessary.

Bad Actor’s Callback: Prompt arrival, no headshot (“You have headshots from my preread and the submission before that, right?”), off-book for sides but deciding to “try something new” after having worked with a coach to “spice up” the material since the preread, gossipy in the waiting room (trying to shake the confidence of the other actors waiting).

Ugly Actor’s Callback: No-show. No call.

Good Actor On Set: Prompt, professional, prepared, out of the way but not unfindable until called for, a quick study when given new lines or specific direction, friendly but not “everybody’s new best friend,” a pleasure to work with.

Bad Actor On Set: Late, lazy, lackadaisical, casually hanging out and hard to find when needed, insistent upon doing things a certain way, but gets the job done eventually.

Ugly Actor On Set: A total pain in the ass, gossipy, bad-mouthing cast and crew from this and previous projects, dropping names, bragging about the next big project, bossing around the extras and PAs, complaining about on-set conditions.

Lest you think I jest (and that there’s no way some of this stuff really happens in the world of the PROFESSIONAL ACTOR), I’ll close with the brilliant words of Homer Simpson: It’s funny ’cause it’s true.


Bonnie Gillespie is living her dreams by helping others figure out how to live theirs. Wanna work with Bon? Start here. Thanks!


Originally published by Actors Access at http://more.showfax.com/columns/avoice/archives/000175.html. Please support the many wonderful resources provided by the Breakdown Services family. This posting is the author’s personal archive.

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