I’m addicted to the Game Show Network.

I think I figured out why. It’s always happy there. No matter what silliness is going on in the world, there is something very sweet going on on DirecTV 309, and it’s just enough to remind me that life is good. It started out with a very healthy Match Game addiction, but now I’ve realized, that unless it’s Let’s Make a Deal or Press Your Luck, I’m happy with just about anything on that channel.


16.jpgI am sweet, like Sugar.


I am all sweetness and light; fluffy bunnies and dancing fairies; happiness and joy. Too much of me will make you sick. What Flavour Are You?

I swear I love these quizzes. Much less healthy than my Game Show Network addiction, I’d bet.


Evil Animals
Realizing we’ve spent more money on these cats this year than on ourselves or the TicTac. That’s not sad, it’s just devotion to the animals’ happiness. Oh, my, do they love the California Condo and the slanted cardboard track with catnip rat hidden inside the case! There’s kitty drool all over the dang thing, from them trying to out-mark one another. We JUST brought it home a few hours ago. Oh, boy… another toy to destroy.
Okay, so what’s been going on out here and why have I been so non-Blogging? Well…
You already know about D and her breast cancer and the more bad news and the more surgery and the evil harsh chemotherapy and all of that. That’s been a major time consumer for me, as, working freelance, I’m the one with the best schedule for helping her and still being able to make a living. I just need her to know, no matter what, she’s not alone.
Well, last week (and one day the week before), I subbed in for the casting editor at the paper that runs my column. I do this about once every three months or so and it’s a nice little diversion for me, plus a good way to stay in sync with the overall editorial mission of the paper. I’ve been doing this job in a sub capacity for 2.5 years now. Well, there’s been a significant downturn in the quality of service our clients and our readers are getting, in terms of casting notices in the paper. I realized things were about to get really ugly, and in the wake of our latest corporate buyout (we’re now owned by a MAJOR media conglomerate–pretty sure that’ll get me out of jury duty next month), it’s just getting worse. So, I pulled the associate publisher slash editor in chief aside and asked for a meeting (which was fine, because we also needed to discuss my book proposal and the timeline for hearing back on that from New York). I didn’t want to be one of those people who just goes, “There’s a problem [pointing]. There’s one [pointing elsewhere]. Oh, and there’s another problem [still pointing].” I want to be the type who says, “There’s a problem and here’s my idea.” So, that’s what I did. Looks like my next project will be creating a style manual for casting notices in the paper and doing a little training session with the newer, younger gals in the office about why it is the way it is. During some of the editing last week, the casting assistant said, “Wow! Reading your proofer’s marks is giving me so much of a grammar lesson flashback! I’d forgotten that rule.” Seems that the casting editor figures it’s easier to make all the changes herself rather than tell anyone what the actual right way is to do something… so they never learn and therefore continue making the same mistakes. So, so, very inefficient.
Surreal moment: just saw coach Tubby Smith being interviewed about bobcats on Animal Planet. What the eff is that?
Anyway, as usual, I was asked to come work in the office full-time, something I’ve turned down again and again. There’s just absolutely no way, financially, that they could make that offer worth my time. Still, it was a good week.
On Tuesday, while we were really crunched on the deadline from hell (since the assistant had decided to put off on Monday night all of the things that would’ve made Tuesday morning a quick once-over prior to production and then an easy stretch), my pager was going off like crazy. Too crazed in the office to return a page, so I just kept letting it go. Finally, we were on to the production phase and the assistant girl went home, very ill, since I could just cover everything else for the day, and I returned the page… to Keith’s cell phone. Turns out he’d been calling from Cedars. He’d been hit by a truck while riding his bike to work in Santa Monica. Yep. Day six of his job at Yahoo and he’s run over (well, actually, he flipped over the hood of the truck and then landed on his shoulder and head, rolled to his other shoulder and elbow, and then skidded a few feet on his backpack — big endorsement for Jansport; not a hole in the dang bag, and it kept his back from receiving the same scalping that his shoulders received) on the way there. Of course, it’s too soon for any sort of insurance coverage to have kicked in with the job… so, he’s in the ambulance on the way to Cedars, having given his bike to the guy in the truck (who took it to have repaired, rebuilt, whatever), and wondering how the hell we’re going to afford all of this. He had a CAT-scan and X-rays and got cleaned up, splinted, and sent on his way, Vicodin in hand. My friend Mike went and picked him up, took him home.
Of course, I’m feeling like the most evil girlfriend in the world. My fiancĂ© is trying to get in touch with me and I’m editing in Quark. What the eff?! I suck!
Keith was feeling well enough by last night for us to go out and see Faith Salie (fellow North Springs High School survivor) do standup at the HaHa CafĂ©. In attendance were two other North Springs types: (another) Keith, visiting from Atlanta, and Stacy, who lives here in LA. We’ve all known each other since 1983. Very strange to imagine having known someone that long and still having anything to talk about. Faith was a genius, and she was thrilled that I put together a rather large group of friends to come see her work. I just go out so infrequently anymore that I really do love getting to gather a group to do something fun like see a dear friend do standup. She’s got this whole bit about how she’s a carney attraction back home in Georgia, being over 29 and unmarried. “Look at the spinster woman, Ashleigh. Don’t touch her! You might catch some of that feminism!” Anyway, it’s great stuff. Last night, she had new material about being a single mom (to her 31-year-old boyfriend). “This week we’re working on putting the toilet seat down.” Very cute.
We all went out to a piano bar after and it was such a great scene. There’s this massive projection screen and a satellite dish… they’re having a major Oscar party there. Could be fun. Not sure yet… there’s always so many of those worth going to (I like the one with the biggest cash prize, as I’ve won the pool three years running). Anyway, it was great to have basketball on where the players were 15′ tall… but no sound, so that we could enjoy the vocal stylings of… well, whoever that guy was.
Okay… who famous have I spied of late? Oh, did an interview on the lot of Alias and saw Victor Garber and Patricia Wettig (so, now that her hubby’s crossed the line from executive producer to guest-star, looks like she’ll be along for a few episodes). Attended a wonderful talk with Sir Ian McKellen that our paper put on Monday night. He was so very generous with his time. His answers about the craft of acting and his take on his journey as a performer and as a man were so genuine. Very cool guy. I got pretty ticked off at all of the, “Would you do Gandolf for us?” questions. So lame, reducing this amazing actor to stupid human tricks. Still, he managed to navigate the fools and handle everything with grace and class. Last night… Stacey Stillman (lawsuit-happy bimbo from Survivor) was at the comedy club. Charles Barkley was at the piano bar. And today, while in a toystore on Rodeo Drive, Keith and I realized we were shopping right next to Mike Myers and his wife. Very cool. It made me giggle.
Question: why is the term “on line” correct for (what I would say) “waiting IN line”? What is this “waiting on line” thing? I don’t get it, I don’t like it, and I don’t buy it. Could someone explain?
Loved catching up on the Blogs. Lemme see if I can get all of my comments in order.
Reading: Courtney – great take on Shakespeare. I’m all over your comments! Excellently worded and so right ON! You would LOVE my friend Barry’s short film: Romeo & Juliet, Revisited. I did the makeup, so I may be biased, but dang it’s such a great adaptation of The Bard’s work.
Watching: Tina – Danny Bonaduce is a morning DJ on a big radio station out here. They taped the boxing match this week. The day of, they were on the air with people calling in non-stop going, “Danny, you are gonna spank a Brady!” And Danny’s response, to every caller, was, “That’s what *I’m* talkin’ about!” It was quite funny, all the trash-talking. Should be interesting to see who wins (of course, they couldn’t talk about it after the day of the taping). You’ve heard, I’m sure, that Amy Fisher had to drop out due to the fact that her parole officer wouldn’t let her leave the state for the taping. Tonya Harding ended up fighting Paula Jones, who Danny said was a real hick (no… really?). The mystery fighter against Vanilla Ice was Tod Bridges. Gotta love good TV. I’m so ready to watch that mess!
Amy – why do you go back and forth to New York so much?
Big Mike – how awesome about the hotdogs! That is just the coolest!
Chip – where is this Athens Music Factory? Is it the old place on Clayton that spawned a gun-wielding brawl every other weekend back when I was there? What was that place called? Shae looks great. What grade is she in now? LOL on the Statesboro paper and Worth’s new setup. That’s just awesome. Please tell the folks I said hi and I love them! Acer haikus rock, baby. You are so gifted with that stuff! Dear GAWD I am SO all over that Dead Letter Office keywrap at eBay! What the eff… you gave up eBay for Lent or something, Chip? What’s that about? What can *I* buy for you there, then? I’m so there! Alf bookmarks: I still have mine! And Devlin… man, I had no idea he was still around. How about Ort? Any sightings recently? Oh, and Chip… what do the letters at the top of the page (in the code) mean? I’ve tried to figure it out and I’m at a loss. Also… what was the best $750 you ever spent? Tell me!
Courtney – I am so sad about your moth. That’s just tragic. Did you have any Jade-related advice for me? What is Catch Phrase? I’d like to know about it. We hung out with a great new couple (the guy was an actor in the film we shot in December, so he and his wife joined us last night for the standup and she’s from Texas — great gal) who want us to come over and play Trivial Pursuit. And I was thinking cards…. So, I’m up for learning about games that are fun and not too silly, but not so crazy that they’ll make me super-competitive either.
Jocelyn – I just love all of your fun quiz links and little pictures. Makes me feel like a real slacker for just typing about my life when I Blog, instead of offering up some cool places for you guys to go online. Could I get fired for that?
Susan – Sean in the bathroom… very bizarre. I mean, I know guys are all about their bathroom time… but the CD player and the headphones? That’s a little odd. I guess Keith does that too, but he’s in a bubble bath when he’s in that privacy mode (and usually reading Linux books… the perv).
Trevor – I love your tale of poker! Such good reading, there.
Oh, wow… the messenger guy just showed up (finally) with the blue lines on a casting director’s book I’m reviewing for the paper. I think it’s called, “Wanna be an Actor? ACT Like One!” and it’ll be out in April. He’s going to do Rosie, the Today Show, and Regis & Kelley. So, it’s been like pulling teeth to get an advance copy of this. I think I’ll start reading. Maybe more Blogging in a few days. Keith will take my car a couple of times to work (the bus takes forever) and that’ll leave me here with time on my hands for that sort of thing (I hope). We’re attending the Garland Awards Monday night (like the LA Tony Awards), Faith’s play (“A… My Name is Alice”) on Tuesday night, and then Wednesday, I am parking my ass in front of the TV (after doing an interview) so that I don’t miss the boxing event of the year. One thing that gets me, with this satellite dish, is that except for the local channels, I have to look at the TV Guide and imagine I’m looking at EST. Dammit if I miss one more Real World/Road Rules Battle of the Seasons due to the time zone crap… I’m gonna… well… I guess I’m gonna wait for the next marathon one weekend and get all caught up. Sigh.
Bye, all. XXOO

Bon
bonsite
Barry’s book
Yet again: “Red Dwarf makes my brain want to jump through my nose and destroy my television.” – Jay, on The Psycho Ward, 7/1/01

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