NOTE: The whole time I’m writing this, I’m hearing those folks who’ve been cruel to me saying, “Oh my GAWD, Bonnie! You’re TOO SENSITIVE,” and the hearing of that is my childhood/lifetime trauma trying to get me to abort the mission of hitting POST on this entry.
So, if your reaction to this long-ass read is that I’m too sensitive, then, well… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ yeah. I am. And so what?
Sensitivity is a gift and just because it’s become mainstream to gaslight artists, empaths, and other sensitive souls doesn’t mean it’s right. Certainly, it’s not kind.
But hey, if you’d like a long-ass story about a vision I have for a better world and artists’ collective role in that world, here ’tis. If you’re here only for the woo, scroll all the way down for a long-awaited free webinar I’ve made available for you.
Okay… let’s GO!
I happened to catch a big pharma commercial (there are so many, so I guess it’s pretty easy to see one of ’em, no matter how fast I am with the remote) in which a musician is sick in bed. He feels like crap. He’s surrounded by things designed to comfort us when we’re unwell. And suddenly he receives a text.
It’s an opportunity to play with the band. Tonight. For an already-assembled audience. At a large venue. This is a big opportunity. We can see that the musician really wants to do this gig! The pressure is on. The latest text reveals that showtime is in THIRTY MINUTES! Augh!!!!!
Of course, this is a big pharma commercial and that means the musician is not the commercial’s hero, the drug is.
And he squirts something chemical up his nose, it starts working in under 30 minutes, which means he can toss aside those jammies and the book he was reading. He can throw on his “I’m performing” outfit, grab his gear, and SPRINT across town to make it to the stage, where he plays us out of the commercial as the voiceover artist lists off a thousand side-effects that come with being able to go from sick-in-bed to performing-on-stage in front of an adoring audience in just a half-hour.
Let’s talk about this.
What messages are we getting from this ad?
~ work is more important than rest when we’re unwell
~ a job on no notice is more important than doing whatever we had planned for that time
~ big pharma cures all
~ a drug is a better choice than rest, downtime, boundaries, letting ourselves heal
~ being sick in public is okay if we can dope up enough to look like we feel great
~ a happy audience will applaud that we prioritized them over letting healing take the time it takes (reinforcing in the brain that pleasing others is more important than self-care)
~ capitalism saves the day
I’m sure there are more.
Whether the ad features big pharma or Amazon’s near-instant delivery as our hero, it’s always capitalism/consumerism that wins.
This is not news, of course. I mean… it’s not like I *just* got a TV or something. 😉
But as I imagine #CreatingTheHollywoodWeWant, I envision a different story being told. In the commercial featuring the stressed-out mom with kids that will NOT stop yelling, teasing, playing… being kids… instead of ordering tents to make bedtime a camping adventure, the mom lets the kids know strong emotions are natural. That being at a developmental stage at which strong emotions are confusing is normal. That having a conversation about what’s going on is an option.
The hero is not Amazon; it’s communication.
The winner is not consumerism; it’s connection.
(Yes, I know, sometimes you’ve got screaming kids and the right WHATEVER at the right time IS a life-saver you’d pay a bajilliondy for. I know. Please continue with the point of this piece, here. 😉 Thanks!)
And back to our sick-in-bed musician… I envision the story being about receiving that text for the last-minute gig and instead of grabbing a drug, the musician shows off his healthy boundaries and says no. He role models having the enoughness to turn down a gig because he respects his healing process more than “making something work.” And if his rent is due and he really needs this job, the conversation is about THAT issue.
Y’know… that out-of-work artists not being able to pay their bills is so incredibly real that we ALL have known a time when we weren’t sure how we were going to get through that personal financial crisis.
The hero is not big pharma; it’s a reality check.
The winner is not capitalism; it’s knowing we’re not alone.
During yesterday’s Connect with Bon (a bonus I offer to all members of my various communities — a Zoom with no agenda, no recording, no stress), I mentioned that showbiz and I are… um… sort of “on a break” right now.
No, that doesn’t mean you can no longer do my life-changing 100 days. No, that doesn’t mean you can’t find Self-Management for Actors out there in the world. No, that doesn’t even mean I won’t do speaking engagements or 1-on-1 coaching sessions that are entirely about our beloved industry. Of course, none of that has gone away.
But to preserve my love for this industry, I needed to put some space around it for myself. I needed to forgive it for breaking my heart so many times. I needed to role model that it’s entirely okay to hit PAUSE on a creative career while healing became my full-time job.
We even have a day in the aforementioned 100-day course, Get in Gear for the Next Tier, that’s specifically about forgiving show business for all the times it has hurt us. And accepting the apology that will never come. Because being a creative means having so much talent that you can’t keep it to yourself… in a business that will prioritize money over everything else, every time.
We really *are* Creating the Hollywood We Want when we bravely say NO to a last-minute gig. When we negotiate for more money before signing the deal memo. When we require inclusion riders. When we walk the line with our striking writers. When we watch the content our business is creating with a more critical eye than ever before.
Not because we’re trying to catch it being WRONG… but because we’re trying to catch opportunities to help it do BETTER.
“Yes, Shark Tank, you did a great thing by investing in that Black-owned business. Now could we do it without all the white saviorism?”
“Yes, Pose, you did a great thing by hiring trans actors. Now could you invest in their training so they shine like their costars who’ve had exponentially more opportunities and therefore more experience to master the craft?”
Tell me what you would add to a wishlist for the new Hollywood.
Even if you’re not in the biz, share what you’d like to see happen.
I’ve long said storytellers are here to heal the world.
What does that look like?
Start by reimagining the stories that are already being told.
Does it always have to be capitalism/consumerism that wins?
Does it always have to be a billionaire who profits?
Does it always have to be artists who compromise? Or take the high road?
I don’t have Big Answers in this long-ass post. Just some questions. 😉 We’re doing a deep dive on Your Relationship with Your Energetic Load in Expansive Capacity right now, and it’s really opened my eyes to where we’re taxed due to “expenses” that aren’t even ours (but we end up bearing them).
Yesterday, a client said she just keeps following the sparkles in life, and I kind of love that. What if that’s the whole deal? Follow the sparkles. Do what lights you up. Have fun; don’t suck!
Could a whole bunch of THAT make everything better?
You tell me. Comments are open just below.
Oh, and if you’re looking for my latest woo goodie, I’ve put the amazing webinar astrologer Rachel Lang and I did together about Client Attraction and the Moon over here for you. Totally free. 😉 Just scroll down that page to find it… and ENJOY!!