Ho-Hum vs. Hell Yes

This week’s hit from the archives comes with a bonus vid, shot for the badasses enrolled in SMFA Online. Watch it, and be inspired!

Wanna read more about this concept? Cool. This will be short, because it’s really dang simple.

If you had a choice between an agent about whom you’re ho-hum or an agent about whom you’re hell yes, which would you choose? More importantly, if you had a choice between an agent who is ho-hum about YOU or an agent who is “hell yes” about you, which would you choose?

Think about that. So many actors get into that mindset of, “I gotta get an agent” that they miss the point that a ho-hum agent (in either direction) is really useless. Just like a ho-hum meeting with a casting director, a director, a producer, a showrunner, a writer, anyone in a position to eventually cast that actor is a waste of time.

But that doesn’t mean those encounters don’t happen, daily. They do. And that’s because actors tend to operate from a place of lack, a place of need. They believe it’s better to meet with SOMEONE (regardless of enthusiasm level) than to spend that same time hustling, researching, working toward a better long-term approach to success in this business.

Because signing with someone who is only ho-hum about you is no better than you signing with someone about whom you’re ho-hum, I’d like to ask you to go into every delicious opportunity thinking about what would make you say HELL YES, about anything!

Imagine, if you’ve gone to the trouble to meet with a ho-hum rep then to sign with a ho-hum rep (and then — at best — get submitted by that ho-hum rep with a ho-hum attitude, from time to time), you’re then living at a ho-hum LEVEL. And, worst of all, you’ve tied yourself up at the ho-hum level when you could’ve left yourself open for a HELL YES, and isn’t that better? Isn’t that what you’d prefer? Isn’t that what the buyers you’ll eventually meet would prefer?

Hell yes!

Let’s approach all encounters as a choice between “ho-hum” and “hell yes.” I know what I’d pick, at every turn. Don’t you?

Every time you score a meeting with someone and DON’T click, consider celebrating! You’ve just eliminated a “ho-hum” from your life. That makes more room for the next “hell yes” you’ll encounter. Sure, you’ve got to map out who that is. You may not always know ’til after you’ve had that face-to-face (so you may waste SOME time). But to get ninja with this, you’ll need to do research that runs off most of your colleagues in this business. But what a lovely reward you may receive for doing so!

To live a world of HELL YES? Excellent! Good night, “ho-hum” stuff. Let’s say we’re glad we experienced that, so we’d know it’s nothing we want to invite in as we head to our next tier!

Excited to hear from y’all on this. I’ve opened up comments below, and I hope you’ll dig in and share your thoughts. Ready to leave ho-hum behind? Let’s do this!


Bonnie Gillespie is living her dreams by helping others figure out how to live theirs. Wanna work with Bon? Start here. Thanks!


Originally published by Actors Access at http://more.showfax.com/columns/avoice/archives/001444.html. Please support the many wonderful resources provided by the Breakdown Services family. This posting is the author’s personal archive.

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11 Comments

  1. Patrizia Milano May 15, 2012 at 12:33 pm

    Uh Bonnie! Once again you hit the target! It’s all about energy. the energy behind the connection, the energy that our intention (or our reps for that matter) rides upon, the energy that once embraced will allow us to connect with same-energy-level people, circumstances, opportunities, etc. So YEAH! Why settle? Why not go for that place of excitement within ourselves and others that resonate with that. What a concept! And why not apply this to any relationships in our lives for that matter…? Thank you awesome lady. Blessing to you for sharing, as always. With gratitude, Patrizia

    Reply
  2. Bonnie Gillespie Bonnie Gillespie May 15, 2012 at 7:18 pm

    Thank you, sweetheart. So happy to see you participating here. 🙂 I agree. It’s about expecting better! Trusting we’re worth that. 🙂 For sure! Lining up with those who give us that HELL YES (and to whom we give that, too). GOOD stuff!

    Thank you for being here! Keep at it! 😀

    Reply
  3. Dana Weddle July 12, 2013 at 4:03 pm

    This is JUST what I needed to hear. I need a HELL YES agent! Just like dating, I have to be 100% myself so I attract MY PEOPLE. I would never date a guy who wasn’t TOTALLY STOKED about me. So why would I ever go with an agent who was any less than PUMPED about WHO. I. AM. ??

    Ding ding ding! Wow. Thank you, Bonnie. It makes complete sense… I guess we just have to give ourselves permission to settle for no less than awesome.

    Reply
  4. Bonnie Gillespie Bonnie Gillespie July 14, 2013 at 2:55 am

    Lovely, Dana. Yeah… sometimes just hearing about a relationship from another perspective can make ALL the difference. I’m shocked at how actors accept LESS THAN what they truly deserve, daily, with their reps. Good for you, getting CLEAR on what a HELL YES means for you! Make it happen, darlin’! 🙂

    Reply
  5. Kurtis Mast February 7, 2017 at 12:47 pm

    I’m a new member of the Self-Management revelation! Finally found the content that lets me grab hold of my work by the balls, and I’m feeling more empowered daily. So thank you Bonnie and the web that grows.

    I’m currently rep’d by a marvelous Manager in Vancouver (my hometown) who provides me considerable self-tapes for principal roles. I love it but it also feels like throwing spaghetti on the wall of my career as I sit back and wait for the auditions- so! I’m thinking of rep’s here in LA (where I live) with an Agent (a Tier down from Vancouver) who can put me into the room I’m ready to seize. Thoughts on the dual-tiering representation?

    Reply
  6. Sarah Carey February 7, 2017 at 7:06 pm

    Ooof. Man I really needed this today. How did you know?!

    Reply
  7. Bonnie Gillespie Bonnie Gillespie February 8, 2017 at 1:16 pm

    Kurtis that’s so great that you’re beginning to research whether you may want to consider representation in multiple markets. Definitely, in a relationship business such as ours, we can find that reps out of market may not have the reach for rooms we need to get into locally. Enjoy the process of digging in on this!

    Ah, Sarah… I’m so glad this landed at the right time. {{{hugs}}}

    Reply
  8. Sandra Patton May 25, 2017 at 8:57 am

    Thank you so much! I have been looking for this answer and meditating on it. I am ready to be free and have the strength to do it now! It is so scary but I know I need to move on. You are empowering! And I cannot have FOMO because the agent isn’t even getting me out and I do not want to be associated with her anymore anyway. It is so scary to move on without an agent but I know it is for the best.

    Reply
    1. Bonnie Gillespie Bonnie Gillespie May 25, 2017 at 9:56 am

      So proud of you, SP! It’s only as scary as being single when the alternative is a relationship that’s not healthy. We know in our gut that single is better ’til we find that HELL YES and then it’s like, “OMG! Why did I put up with that crappy relationship for so long?!?” You’ve got this. 🙂

      Reply
      1. Sandra Patton May 25, 2017 at 2:29 pm

        I totally agree! I have been sitting on this decision for months and so glad I finally ended it!

        Reply

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