One of my colleagues was having a very-typical-of-these-days experience in which something that started out positive (researching online for a project she’s excited about) turned into a negative spiral of impostor syndrome and low enoughness.
Yup.
Big astro is not helping with that, for one. But also, enoughness is something we have to work to keep! It’s not once won and forever ours.
Enoughness is like any other status we have to maintain (our baseline fitness level, our dental health, our sobriety, our marriage): It requires fortifying on the daily.
Here’s what I do:
~ Set a timer for flow states (82 minutes is my optimal, 94 will work, 112 and I’m toast and it’s trouble). Do not ignore that timer. Even if something is really feeling GREAT, the stopping, resetting, and (maybe) going back in is not negotiable. Because once I pass the 100-minute mark, we’re in a dangerous neighborhood, even on something I’m LOVING.
~ Have a “dip kit.” (Like THIS ONE.) This is a list of things that never fail to get me out of a dip. Stuff like going for a walk, spending time with animals, doing a boxing match or throwing snowballs on the Wii-Fit, listening to Abraham-Hicks, taking a LUSH bubble bath, taking a nap, working a puzzle, doing some pole tricks, blending some essential oils, starting up my FEEL GOOD playlist, etc. I create this list when I’m feeling good as a way of leaving myself a lovenote for the times I don’t feel good; it’s a map back.
~ Give myself a shit-ton of grace for the very real, very now experience that is eroding everyone’s setpoint of enoughness. We’re all fatigued. We’re all way more quickly depleted after becoming inspired. We all need a nap or icecream or a nap AFTER icecream (the! best!) and there’s nothing wrong with maintaining mental, emotional, and spiritual health at such a crucial intersection of ALL SO MUCH happening for so long.
Most of all, I see the negative self-talk as my sweet brain doing everything it can to protect me, keep me safe and small, allow me to be a part of a known/low-growth herd so I’m less of a target at a time when we’re all actively feeling like targets so much of the time. I say, “Good job, brain.” And she stands down, just by being acknowledged. (“She” being my amygdala.)
Last week my mind-body doctor had me write down the phrase “This is the trauma; this is not you” about how very very very low I’ve been able to get lately. It’s not me. It’s not forever. It’s the collective triggering we’re undergoing that seems infinite that’s doing a number on us. Just giving that truth space to be is helping me a LOT. My enoughness can withstand a lot… because I have self-care practices in place that make that possible.
And when it’s not possible… icecream. Nap. Repeat. 😉
Did you catch my enoughness convo with RTT goddess Glyniss Trinder on her Conversations with Changemakers podcast? Check it out here (especially lovely for the woo-curious).
Much love,
Enoughness is an inside job… and sometimes you need a guide to find your way there. Let Bonnie Gillespie get you started.