Hello beautiful people of Expansive Capacity!
It’s time for that good ol’ Superpower Sunday badassery! 🙂
This is all about how we can implement wee changes that can turbocharge our *existing* superpowers so that we don’t dim our own lights due to inertia, stress, or any other upper-limit problem that reveals itself along our path.
This month’s Superpower Sunday is a focus on Baseline Criteria.
I first codified this superpower a year ago. Let me set the stage.
I’d been on bedrest, I’d weathered a hospital stay, my undiagnosable mystery pain was in charge of everything and we were about to head to Georgia for my father’s 85th birthday party. Because if I didn’t go, the family story would be “Bonnie didn’t show up.” And even if all I could do is be propped up against a wall doped up on painkillers, dammit, I was *gonna* show up!
But because by this time, we knew what I’m contending with is a mind-body healing journey — one that involves some deep diving into childhood trauma and maladaptive stress responses, doing heavy-duty reparenting and neuralpathway rerouting — we also knew there was no way to go into a room of 100+ people whose Trump-bumper-sticker SUVs filled the parking lot, be in the presence of the three people who’ve been cruelest to me my entire life, and NOT have a plan.
The plan became: Baseline Criteria.
There were three things I needed to do at this party.
1. Say “Happy birthday, Daddy.”
2. Catch up with my favorite aunt.
3. Check on my niece.
Everything else? Optional. Bonus points.
When we realized that this Baseline Criteria could take as few as 20 minutes to complete, suddenly everything got super simple — something my physical, mental, and emotional health deeply needed — because this meant we could be DONE with this party for which we’re flying across the country, staying for five days, spending a few grand… in under a half-hour.
And that would be okay!
WOW.
Of course, all these thoughts flooded in about what people would think if we were there for such a short period of time, what they might say, all the usual expectations-laden things that cause us to do things we may not actually be healthy enough to do… and there was such peace in knowing that there is complete freedom to feel DONE with everything once Baseline Criteria is achieved.
Ever.
Like with everything.
Since realizing the power of Baseline Criteria, Keith and I have used it before going to Hollywood networking events, I’ve used it in another trip back to Atlanta this year, and he used it at Comic-Con during his film’s premiere! Lovely clients have started using it in their auditions and at rehearsals and in negotiations. I’ve even shared this with a dear casting director friend of mine who says it has revolutionized her sessions!
Baseline Criteria. You’re about to attend a premiere. You’re feeling extra introverted. You do all the smart Self-Management for Actors networking prep to be sure you’ve studied up on whom you’ll meet, you’ve practiced your Brandprov, and you’re even getting in a nap before the event. Now you revisit your Baseline Criteria.
It could be as simple as a photo of you on the red carpet for you to add to your gallery at IMDb. It could be staying through the final credits to cheer when your friend’s name is on the big screen. Perhaps it’s being present for the cast and crew talkback/Q&A and you needn’t see the film at all. Or maybe there’s a particular agent whose hand you want to shake.
Whatever the Baseline Criteria is, set it. Set it as early as possible and watch it cause you to relax about what’s to come. It’s as if BY KNOWING we have permission to “call it done” once we’re at Achievement Unlocked status on our Baseline Criteria, we somehow have a far more pleasant experience before, during, and after whatever it is we’re facing.
I want you to try this. And I want you to notice where you start feeling the freedom that setting Baseline Criteria creates. When we’re super clear on what it is that we require from any encounter, experience, or exchange, it’s as though infinite possibility opens up for the space that USED TO be occupied by anxiety or dread… or even anticipation!
Let’s start living in BONUS POINTS, y’all. Because that’s what everything after Baseline Criteria turns out to be!
Have FUN with this deceptively simple superpower!
In fact, whip out that September Aligned Hustle Calendar at the Welcome page if you haven’t already. Let’s plan for magic next month and beyond!
I’m looking forward to hearing about how things are going for you in the dojo! Do come share, please! It’s so cool being in on your workout.
Crazy in love with you all! 🙂
Enoughness is an inside job… and sometimes you need a guide to find your way there. Let Bonnie Gillespie get you started.