Whether a lovely creative comes to me for showbiz advice, astrological perspective, or anything in between, the main commonality is what they’re looking for: Bon, what should I be doing?

It can be “Bon, what should I be doing to get a great agent?” or “Bon, what should I be doing to weather my Saturn return?” or “Bon, what should I be doing to keep money flowing in while we’re on strike?” — the end of the question doesn’t matter as much as that constantly-repeated BEGINNING: What should I be doing?

What if the better question is What could I STOP doing?

James Clear quote about removing something
Click to enbiggen.

We’re so quick to think we need to add things onto our list. Buy another book. Learn a new way to optimize something. Get told (or even scolded) about the DOING we haven’t been doing. Find out a hack, a shortcut, a secret that — once we start doing it — will fix whatever it is we think needs fixing. (Thanks, capitalism! Thanks, consumerism! Thanks, big pharma!)

Today, I’d like to ask you to consider what it is that you could STOP doing.

Consider not what you could ADD to your life to try and get things feeling better, but what you could REMOVE from it. What is it that depletes you? Could you stop doing that? Or as much of that?

It’s been a couple o’ years since I shared about writing on my whiteboard: “What does a life that I don’t have to recover from even look like?”

What does a life I don't have to recover from even look like? Bonnie Gillespie
Click for the blog post.

Gotta tell ya… the joy of identifying what has too heavy an energetic load and then choosing NOT to do whatever that is anymore is some of the yummiest medicine there is.

So I ask you:
What depletes you?
What’s got too heavy an energetic load?
And could you stop doing that?
Or do less of that?
Or take a break from that?

Here’s to living lives we don’t have to recover from! And to looking LESS for what we should start doing and MORE for what we could STOP doing.

Thanks for reading.
You’re awesome.

Bonnie Gillespie is living her dreams by helping others figure out how to live theirs. Wanna work with Bon? Start here. Thanks!

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  1. Lisa Sanders Ashcraft September 19, 2023 at 5:49 am

    Bon, this speaks a lot to me right now. I reached an energetic, crash and burn after working in healthcare for over 15 years and being a rehab Director during Covid in a skilled nursing facility. Something in me just screamed “stop!” JUST STOP. So I did. I am also a wife, mother of two girls and a creative artist (actress/singer). It is one of the scariest things I’ve ever done, stopping Dayton working, and it still is. Lo and behold, the SAG AFTRA strike arrived, just as I was stepping out of my healthcare career. But something pushes me forward. Something tells me that being an actress storyteller is healing, not just for myself, but for the entire collective of our souls. The stories that are created assist us in our soul journeys through life. I truly believe this with all my being and this is the new way that I wish to be a healer in the world. I have jumped into this with a faith that I’ve never had before ,tinges of fear creep up on occasion, but in the end, I know I have done what my spirit calls me to do and in doing that, somehow the universe will catch me. Much love to you and all who take in your wisdom, light and joy 💗

    1. Bonnie Gillespie September 21, 2023 at 4:12 pm

      Isn’t it great to know those “creeps” of doubting energy are residual effects of overused/strong muscles from all the times BEFORE you started trusting your gut and spirit’s guidance so completely? Yes yes yes to how we’re always on the universe’s best path for our souls!!! Love you, lady!

    2. Laura September 29, 2023 at 9:28 am

      Rock on, Lisa! Shine your light!

  2. Cassandra Alleyne September 19, 2023 at 5:16 pm

    Yes, Bonnie! This brilliantly affirms & encourages me along on a removal/release/why bother going there/does that truly serve what I really want or is it a habit (?) process In which I’ve been getting nudged to progress. Can’t tell you how helpful & inspiring it is to read your eloquent post along those lines. <3 <3 <3

    1. Bonnie Gillespie September 21, 2023 at 4:11 pm

      Yessssssss! Oh, Cassandra, I’m so glad this lines up with exactly the inner work you’re already doing. Keep at it!

  3. Maria September 22, 2023 at 8:57 am

    Lovely post, thank you for this. I recently read a book called 4,000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals. One of the ideas that has stuck with me is “strategic underachievement.” What might I give B- or C+ effort to so that I can focus on storytelling? That was a nice reframe for me, as someone who usually pays great attention to detail in just about everything. 😁

    1. Bonnie Gillespie September 23, 2023 at 12:19 am

      Ooh, that’s really good, Maria. Thank you for sharing that tip. It’s a good one!! So glad you’re finding more focus for your storytelling gifts.

  4. Calliope Tsoukalas September 22, 2023 at 9:59 am

    Thank you so much for these posts/emails, Bon. This question you posed really stuck with me, and I found the answer. Burn out is such a thing these days. It’s baffling. I am a part of it and seeing more and more where I can let go. Thank you for your inspiration. You’ll be hearing more from me in the coming months as some of my plans finally unfold, simply because I’m finally ready to let go. Lots of love and light to you. ♥️✨

    1. Bonnie Gillespie September 23, 2023 at 12:19 am

      How beautiful. I’m eager to learn all about your latest adventures in letting go and allowing ease!

  5. Jean September 27, 2023 at 11:13 am

    I love this so much… Transmuting now….Thank you.

  6. Laura September 29, 2023 at 9:27 am

    Coming off of your email, this really resonated with me: “ Know what’s *actually* worth your energy and what’s not… and when you choose to do the latter, simply choose it mindfully.”

    So I had to mosey on over here and I’m so glad I did! Always glad to come to Bonnie-land.

    The idea of letting go of what depletes me is such good food for thought! Talk about “soul food.”

    Thank you for this, Bon.

    1. Bonnie Gillespie September 29, 2023 at 3:08 pm

      Love you, Laura. Enjoy ALL your soul food. Make it truly nourishing!


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