One of the ways I know I’m healing is that I am less likely to speak in absolutes. I’m less likely to think in black or white. I’m less likely to perceive anything as binary, even though I have decades (and generations) of practice with that worldview.
The human brain LOVES binary. It’s a major way we sort a bajilliondy pieces of information every millisecond and THE primary binary the brain is designed to evaluate correctly is:
LIKELY TO MAKE ME DIE or LIKELY TO KEEP ME ALIVE.
Since the brain’s job is to keep us alive as long as possible, being RIGHT about what might kill us is pretty dang important. So we have this gloriously well-practiced primal brain that’s constantly saying to us, “That might kill you. That might kill you. That might kill you.”
And its messaging gets MORE space than any messaging about what might be great, fun, expansive, amazing, next-level, life-changing, exciting for us… because as far as the amygdala is concerned, all of that stuff falls in the LIKELY TO MAKE ME DIE category.
(Read about my commitment to adding the words, “And I didn’t die!” to every scary thing I accomplished, a few years back, HERE. Ooh, and when I Googled to get that link for you, I also found this archive of a very cool creative entrepreneurship project I did with Tara McMullin in 2019 called “Candid Confidence.” Click here to consume some REALLY inspiring stories, including mine.)
So, if being more open to non-binary thinking is a sign I’m healing, I can also tell when I’m activated, triggered, or clinging to old/familiar coping mechanisms: I’m more likely to speak in absolutes, think in black or white, live in the binary.
When I catch myself — or my clients — using absolutes, I’ll quickly remind myself (or them) that we’re all mutable. We’re all in a state of constant change. We’re living in bodies where 98% of the atoms that make up these bodies get replaced every year.
Essentially, every 16 days, 72% of what makes us real, physical beings… is totally replaced. EVERY 16 DAYS.
This thrills me!
ANY condition, any belief, any well-practiced worldview… can be completely replaced in a matter of days (and certainly within a year). I just have to notice it’s happening and lean into the changes I want rather than pushing against what I don’t want.
To woo it up: I’ve been leaning into my Pisces North Node in recent years. It is NOT a comfortable place to lean for this Cardinal-dominant gal. Mutable is just NOT a part of my chart with this one exception… and the North Node is something we struggle to get comfortable using over the course of our lives. That combo = GROWING PAINS.
And what does the amygdala think about change? Right. It thinks change is likely to lead to extinction so… don’t do that. 😉 Talk about upper-limit problem stuff, right?
Lots of links today, I know.
I’ve been putting this whole thing together for days… I keep stopping to play with Mala… and I’m sooooooooo enjoying my 5th House profection year! Saturn rulership be damned! I’ve found a way to live in joy. (More soon. But not on social media for a while. I’m taking a break while Mars is in Gemini.)
Okay… to sum up: Let’s embrace the Mutable. Let’s realize we all already ARE constantly changing, even if a part of the brain feels as though it’s life-or-death we’re risking with this expansion. And let’s make that feel safe enough to keep going. Keep growing. Allowing ourselves to evolve entirely in a matter of days if we’re ready.
It’s exciting in all the terrifying and electric ways.
Lemmeknow if you need my help. Comments are open just below!