These may not look that different, but they represent a significant shift in focus, which makes a big difference in how my work gets done, how I show up in the world, and ultimately how the empire continues to grow… now with energetic boundaries galore!
This past November-December is the first time since 2013 (hello, 8-year Venus cycles) we did not run a massive launch into our online membership. It’s the first time in nearly a decade I wasn’t working EVERY day (including Christmas, the anniversary of Charlsie’s death) all through the holiday season. Of course, that was by design, so I could NOT FEEL so much pain my life was filled with.
What can I say? Avoidant attachment style + a lifetime of reinforcement that hyper-productivity is rewarded and praised = easy to overwork myself into a year-end that would allow me not to feel.
And then I got sober in 2016. And then I went on bedrest for a chunk of 2018. And as I came out of the dark night of my soul in 2021 (thanks, Chiron return), it became clear that my being a good soldier to the capitalist cis-het straight white male ableist patriarchy wasn’t working for me.
In May of 2021, I declared NO YEAR-END LAUNCH.
My team assured me I was just licking my wounds from a brutal 7 weeks with only 5 days being off-camera and a disappointing project. Sure. But I also knew: I’m done. DONE with the way it’s always been done. Done with how success is measured. Done with using the Self-Management for Actors tools to help a white male actor complaining that he’s not getting as many auditions anymore.
Burn it to the motherfuckin ground.
Or at least… reboot.
And reboot, she did.
As I said to my badass coach Natalie Miller the other day, re: 2022 — I’m just getting started. They ain’t ready… and they ain’t gotta be.
Unapologetic enoughness is pretty dang unfuckwithable if you ask me.
Come follow my Chart Harmony Instagram account if you’d like to see some of where this is all headed.
And please share with me where you’re headed for now too! My word of the year is RESONANCE. 💫 If it’s not resonating with me, it’s not FOR me.
Love and Rockets,
Bonnie Gillespie is living her dreams by helping others figure out how to live theirs. Wanna work with Bon? Start here. Thanks!